Dear friends
Last Sat was an emotional day for me as I laid my brother Charles Tan to rest.
Charles was the other Tan in Tan and Tan Lawyers.
He is survived by his wife Cynthia and 3 children, my mum and 9 other siblings. His has been a tough life but he has always been a good brother to all his other siblings.
He earned my biggest respect by the way he spent time last year looking after my mum who is also not well.
Many of the siblings and nephews and nieces celebrated his life at my youngest sis's home after the funeral. It was a good night which Charles would have enjoyed too.
Good bye my dear brother Charles
This is my eulogy:
Eulogy for Charles Tan
I would like to thank all of you who have come here to
celebrate Charles’s life. We are here as we have shared the experience of
having known my brother Charles Tan as either a sibling, a relative, a golfing
kaki, a friend and even as a client.
Charles, my dearest brother whom I call Koko is the eldest
boy in a family of 10 children.
If you compare his size to the rest of the brothers, you
will note that he was the shortest in height but he had the biggest heart.
I have always said that he was the shortest one amongst the
siblings as he sacrificed what was on the dinner table for the other siblings.
As the eldest in the family, I recall that he had to work in
the shipyards in Singapore to help the family finances. That must have been
tough as he often told me how very early he had to wake up every day to get to
work.
I remember moving in with him when he rented a bungalow
within the Seletar Air Base in Singapore.
We lived at the Seletar Air base for quite a few years while I was studying
my A Levels in night class.
Koko was by then a lawyer and I remember listening and
discussing his legal cases with me. That inspired me to learn the law. So even
at 16 years of age, I knew I wanted to be a lawyer just like big brother.
I will never forget sharing the house at Seletar Air Base.
That was the first time I was away from mum and dad. But I was safe as we were
together.
In fact that was the time he started dating his wife
Cynthia. That means that I must have known Cynthia for almost as long as Koko
had known her.
In fact just yesterday Cynthia reminded me of how Charles
and I used to take walks to buy indian
vadais from a shop within the air base.
When I went to England to study, it was through the help of
Koko and the rest of the siblings.
Koko and I would write to each other regularly. Of course
during that time, there was no such things as skype or email.
Occasionally we would have a phone call to him from England.
A telephone call from England to Singapore or Australia was such a luxury and
the conversations were always short and to the point so as to save money.
Unfortunately, for me, I still carry that experience with me
and my wife sometimes says I am always too short and curt when talking on the
phone.
It is no secret that most of the siblings who migrated to
Perth did so because of Koko.
Koko was a real trailblazer for the Tan family.
He migrated to Perth more than 40 years ago when Perth was a
real backwater town.
He was one of maybe 2 or 3 Chinese lawyers who had the
courage and the determination to start a legal practice in WA.
It was a period of racial discrimination against the Asians
and yet he found the courage and the skill set to establish his practice of
Charles Tan and Co.
His client base at that time consisted of many who did not
have the language skills to defend or protect themselves.
He did many criminal cases that were reported and which
brought him closer to the Asian community. He championed the Asians who were
being discriminated during that period.
Many of his oldest clients and friends are in this room
today. Papalia, Maggie, Daisy and Wayne all remind me of the Mint House days
where he had his practice as Charles Tan and Co.
In the 1990s, Charles and I registered Tan and Tan Lawyers.
Charles headed the practice. He handed the reins to me in July 2003.
There was a period of time where we went our separate ways
because of a difference in opinion, However we were able to settle our
differences as brothers.
Whatever differences we had over the practice of law was reconciled
by the fact that we shared the same beliefs in family and the caring of our
parents.
Our mother who is still alive in Singapore was diagnosed
with dementia quite a few years ago.
Koko went above and beyond the call of duty in flying back
to Singapore on many occasions to help look after mum.
I must also say my thanks yous to my other brothers and
sisters in Singapore who have continued to care for our mum especially Lawrence
and his wife Irene and daughters.
I will always treasure and respect Koko for the time he took
to look after mum. I know mum never said it, but she always favoured Koko as he
helped the family while working at the shipyard and was a contributing
breadwinner for our big family of 10.
Koko leaves behind a loving wife, Cynthia who stood beside
him through everything that God threw at them.
I have seen how Cynthia did everything to ensure Koko was as
comfortable as possible so as to give him the dignity to endure his last few
months on earth fighting cancer.
He leaves behind also his beloved son Timothy and daughters
Vicky and Liz.
I have learned from Koko the importance of bestowing love on
your children and I am thankful my relationship with my 2 boys are as close as Koko’s
relationship with his children.
I would like to just quickly read some portions of emails
sent by some of Koko’s friends:
Kevin De sousa: a fellow lawyer:
“Although
I did not work with Charles at Tan & Tan Lawyers, I often would call him up
to ask for his guidance in criminal law matters. On several occasions, we
went out drinking during the days when I was at Tan & Tan Lawyers. We would
talk about his days in Singapore, how he started his legal practice in Perth,
how he smashed his car into a home at Wanneroo Road after a drinking session,
how he got his Singapore drug smuggling client acquitted in his early
days of practice in Perth which led him to being known among the Asian
community, why he migrated to Perth, his articles for the newspaper in
Singapore, his satay machine and business etc.
Charles
was always fascinating with his stories and I will always remember him as a
very helpful and humble person and a lawyer who had a great passion and
learning for the law.”
Minnie Seth, an old client of Charles: “I was privileged to
have had him as my solicitor when I was starting out on my career and will
always remember his calm and kind way in which he handled every problem
that drifted into my conveyancing world and reassured that there was nothing to
worry about. God rest his soul in peace. I will always remember him as a
decent, kind and good man”.
Teo Soh Lung, a fellow lawyer and my master in Singapore:
“Yes, Charles had been with Teo Lai & Lee ever since it
was formed. We sought his advice and his experience in criminal legal aid in
Australia when we set out mind to form such a scheme. He was always helpful and
supportive of the wild plans we have. And he was a great criminal lawyer”.
Kee Yong Yee: “He had a strong conviction
for justice and he was a strong fighter against racial discrimination. It
is so sad that he left this world so early. “
On behalf of Cynthia and her children and the Tan family,
thank you for coming today to celebrate Charles’s life.
Lastly I end with a simple quote from Terry Pratchett, an
English author.
“Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is
still spoken?” ― Terry Pratchett
I am sure Charles’s name will continue to be spoken by all
of us.
Raymond
